Whomever you lose is always and forever with you through all eternity. You are forever together in the mind of all those that have known and loved you. Here's a Psalm for you. It may not seem directly appropriate but perhaps it is. It is a Psalm much beloved of female peace activists but it also speaks of the eternity that is forever true regardless of the apparent shape of life and regardless of any terrible but transient cruel cataclysm that hits you:
1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
2 Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;
3 Though the waters thereof roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof. Selah.
4 There is a river, the streams whereof shall make glad the city of God, the holy place of the tabernacles of the most High.
5 God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved: God shall help her, and that right early.
6 The heathen raged, the kingdoms were moved: he uttered his voice, the earth melted.
7 The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah.
8 Come, behold the works of the LORD, what desolations he hath made in the earth.
9 He maketh wars to cease unto the end of the earth; he breaketh the bow, and cutteth the spear in sunder; he burneth the chariot in the fire.
10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
11 The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah.
I have no idea why we live in broken bodies and lead broken lives and are struck by terrible tragedies. Life is imperfect and we are all imperfect though life is essentially good and essentially we are good. And when tragedy strikes and we or our loved ones are harmed or damaged, we have some sort of alter ego that is the sum total of all we might have been had we stood perfect. There is a perfect you just as there is a perfect me. So too with the person you have lost who lives now and forever. And it is that perfect memory that you are both reaching for and remembering. Woody Allen once said, "Life is as short as a butterfly's fart but death lasts forever". Which is kind of reassuring.
This transient existence with all its pain and beauty is just a small part of our lives.
You are surrounded by God's love - and it will sustain you. It cannot fail.